Buffalible-Genesis
23 Feb 2010The science edition of Genesis.
It is interesting and suitable to my world view!
It was written in Chinese, and I have translated it into English.
1:01 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
1:02 The singularity was without form, and void, and all the laws of physics were not suitable.
1:03 And God said, Let there be light, and there was light. And God saw the light, that it was good; and God set the speed of light to 299,792,458 m/s, and it was always the same, no matter how the reference changing.
1:04 God said that light in the wavelength between 0.77 - 0.39 micron was “visible”, and the light outside this weavelength was “invisible.”
1:05 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
1:06 And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
1:07 He set 21% of air to be oxygen, 78% to be nitrogen, and there were a number of carbon dioxide and others. And God called the the tropospheric and stratospheric below the height of 50,000 meters Heaven.
1:08 And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry lands appear. He cut the coastline of dry lands into the shape of each other, letting the geological features on every lands similar, in order to let people conclude that the continentas were drifting.
1:09 Inside the water, he added sodium chloride, potassium chloride, calcium chloride, as well as many other compounds. God said such water with impurities was the sea. God saw that it was good.
1:10 He created different qualities of crude oil, and mixed natural gas and crude oil together, also created hardened blackened forests of the Carboniferous. He saw these resources were good, so he buried them underground and underwater, and enriched them. Manganese nodules were created and put undersea as well. This was the third day.
1:11 And God also made fossils of ancient animals. He also made a few prototypes of ancestors of wisdom creatures appearing in the future, and they were buried together with the flints which they should be able to use, so that people thought the theory of evolution was correct. God saw it was good.
1:12 God said that they would be buried into the ground, but not deeply.
1:13 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, except bananas, upon the earth; and it was so. God thought it seemed too simple, and degraded their performances, leaving room for improvement, and God saw that it was good. This was the fourth day.
1:14 And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years, and to provide the necessary solar energy for photosynthesis.
1:15 He made a variety of elementary particles, and so they could affect each other. God was afraid that this was too simple, people may be not in awe of the world, so divided it into four fundamental interactions – electromagnetism, strong interaction, weak interaction, and gravitation , which can not be united.
1:16 And God made great lights; stellars, called the greater lights, to rule the day, and satellites, called the lesser lights to rule the night. And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth, And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness. Occasionally eclipse and solar eclipse may occor. And it was so.
1:17 God saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
1:18 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven. And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after their kinds. Some with spines and some without spines, some with wings, and some without wings, some with legs and some without legs, some with fins and some without fins, some with claws and some without claws, and others; and then place each of them within a genus, described with different life, domain, kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, genus, and species.
1:19 God did not know what kind the platypus belongs to, so hid it in Australia.
1:20 So species all over the world, some with spines and some without spines, some with wings, and some without wings, some with legs and some without legs, some with fins and some without fins, some with claws and some without claws, and others,from trilobites to the Brontosaurus. But God thought that dinosaurs were too large, so made them extinct, and the remaining bones were collected, made into the long-time fossil, buried into the ground, but not deeply.
1:21 God had a premonition that the technique of radiocarbon dating would be developed, so he changed the carbon-14 content of all things.
1:22 At last God created man in his own image, and created woman referring to a model magazine; again God created the monkeys and orangutans in the image of one of his disgusted enemy after uglifing his appearance.
1:23 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth in zoos.
1:24 And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and potatoes, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed, and bananas; to you it shall be for meat.
1:25 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
1:26 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.
1:27 And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it; because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made. God felt that this was not good enough, so he also blessed the sixth day, and put them together as “St. Weekend.”
1:28 These are the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens.
– Taken from “Buffalible-Genesis”
written by St. Necroman
copied by Ma Boyong
translated by With The Fleeting Years
Oh my God! The Truth is so cool!